So I met up with a long lost friend yesterday. We caught up on our lives and where we are. She's been around the world. I've been buried in books. She doesn't understand how men work. I'm engaged to the love of my life. We looked at how similar we are and laughed and how we ended up where we are, and how even after ten - twelve years, we can still finish each others' sentences. She told me something I took to heart:
"You were always a good person. School did something to us that makes us think otherwise. We did what we had to in order to survive, and we took those mechanisms, as unhealthy as they are, with us in life."
She has a point. I'm going to revisit memories and events from long ago as a way to see how these mechanisms have been a part of me and which ones can stay or go. Part of my growth project is to heal, and there's still a lot of healing that I need to do in that part of my life. My friend actually went to therapy for an extended time in high school and college in order to deal. I wrote. While I don't think I'm at that level of need, writing helps. Writing helps a lot.
Thank you, friend. For coming back. For laughing. For helping me cook dinner. And for reminding me that I don't need to be perfect in order to be good.
RG
