To be completely honest, you sucked for the first few months. When you arrived, I was very unhappy with you. All that I had achieved in 2009 was seemingly undone by your presence and I resented you for it. That job I landed? Terrible and soon to be gone. That Master's degree? Seemingly useless. It wasn't until the springtime that I realized that you had more in store for me than I previously thought.
You were the year that taught me to get up when I fall. Before you, I had never fallen so far. I didn't know what it was like to lose as much as I did. I didn't know what it was to go into a situation hoping to survive rather than expecting to excel. You were a humbling year for a very proud person, and while at once I hated you for it, now I am thankful.
You were the year that brought me to children that needed and wanted my help. You brought me to schools that didn't take what I teach for granted and you proved that not all administrations are as heartless and soulless as my ex-school. You helped me stay on the right path and even pursue more knowledge in it.
You were the year I found my place. I learned who to love, who to trust, and who to leave behind. I learned that I am both a beautiful individual and half of something incredible. And now that I've found how helpful you were to me, you need to go. Funny how that works, 2010.
So I bid you farewell. I wish you happiness in further wisdom within my memories and hope the lessons you taught me remain in my mind in 2011 and beyond.
Sincerely, Your Favorite Work in Progress,
RG
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Friday, December 24, 2010
Epic Upgrade
So this news arrives late due to the computer having a virus, but...
On December 18th of 2010.
In a Karaoke Bar in Manhattan.
Surrounded by friends.
My boyfriend proposed.
The answer was yes, ladies and gents! I'm adding Bride to the reboot mission (granted, it won't be happening for a long time, but it's exciting to think about!!!)
RG
On December 18th of 2010.
In a Karaoke Bar in Manhattan.
Surrounded by friends.
My boyfriend proposed.
The answer was yes, ladies and gents! I'm adding Bride to the reboot mission (granted, it won't be happening for a long time, but it's exciting to think about!!!)
RG
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Updating
It's December now. Approximately three months since I started reassessing who I am, where I am, and where I'm going. In three months, I've been promoted at my job (twice!), been passing all of my grad school classes, connected and reconnected with some folks, and am on my way to a healthier me. Let's go into the details:
1) For a job that is part time, it is really treating me well. I'm the Spanish teacher for two schools and a visiting teacher for one. Next semester, my hours will increase. I will visit more schools as a Spanish Theatre teacher rather than just focusing on language. I'm at a point where I can reconcile something I do as a job with a passion of mine, and I'm super happy about that! Additionally, my second promotion involved curriculum writing, which means I will have more of a say in how this company works and I'm slowly but surely working my way up the ladder. If you had asked me last year if I still wanted to teach, I definitely would have said "NO" without thinking twice. It isn't the money or prestige that I'm thankful about when it comes to this job, it's the fact that these fine people have given me the confidence I had lost in this past year, and I am eternally grateful to them for doing that.
2) Grad school has once again reached the point of being tedious to me. In all fairness, it was a little silly of me to apply for 12 credits and work at the same time. Still, I'm doing well enough. Time is growing short and a lot is due in the upcoming weeks. When I'm not panicking, I'm getting things together. Next semester, I opted to take two regular classes and an on-line class. We'll see how those go, and if 9 credits really is any less stressful than 12 credits.
3) I've been hanging out and being more social with people than I have in the past. I took a sabbatical from being social about a year and a half ago for reasons previously mentioned in the blog (The Spectre of a Dead Relationship). I took this sabbatical because at the time, after everything had blown up, I thought my social life was over. Then I realized something: I was giving that asshole too much credit. He was not and never will be the center of my social group because I don't have just one social group. I have many. I remembered that I have a lot of people who love me and care about me and know that I am good enough just the way I am. As stated, not my place to spread stories or gossip or whatever you want to call it, but I'm glad to have reached a point in my life where I can stand up to a bully and not be afraid or ashamed. I'm glad to have found and re-discovered friends that are dear to me and bring happiness to me. What I've learned from this: real friends are to be loved and cherished. And it is always worth standing up for yourself.
4) My body and I are on uneasy terms. As stated before, we haven't always had the best relationship. As of now, I've lost about five pounds this month, with many more to go. I'm not stopping until I'm pleased with myself and I'm serious about getting healthier. I've cut out all drinks except water, coffee, milk, and tea. I'm taking a multivitamin that should be getting me nutrients in case my food choices don't. I'm kickboxing twice a week and trying to make a gym visit at least once a week in addition to that, with more visits to be added when there's time. And my biggest change, not eating when I'm not hungry, has been a very good change to make indeed. It's a change that has made me face emotions I usually hide with food. I've accepted that this will be a long journey for me to make, but like many others I have embarked on, it will totally be worth it.
That's all for now, folks.
RG
1) For a job that is part time, it is really treating me well. I'm the Spanish teacher for two schools and a visiting teacher for one. Next semester, my hours will increase. I will visit more schools as a Spanish Theatre teacher rather than just focusing on language. I'm at a point where I can reconcile something I do as a job with a passion of mine, and I'm super happy about that! Additionally, my second promotion involved curriculum writing, which means I will have more of a say in how this company works and I'm slowly but surely working my way up the ladder. If you had asked me last year if I still wanted to teach, I definitely would have said "NO" without thinking twice. It isn't the money or prestige that I'm thankful about when it comes to this job, it's the fact that these fine people have given me the confidence I had lost in this past year, and I am eternally grateful to them for doing that.
2) Grad school has once again reached the point of being tedious to me. In all fairness, it was a little silly of me to apply for 12 credits and work at the same time. Still, I'm doing well enough. Time is growing short and a lot is due in the upcoming weeks. When I'm not panicking, I'm getting things together. Next semester, I opted to take two regular classes and an on-line class. We'll see how those go, and if 9 credits really is any less stressful than 12 credits.
3) I've been hanging out and being more social with people than I have in the past. I took a sabbatical from being social about a year and a half ago for reasons previously mentioned in the blog (The Spectre of a Dead Relationship). I took this sabbatical because at the time, after everything had blown up, I thought my social life was over. Then I realized something: I was giving that asshole too much credit. He was not and never will be the center of my social group because I don't have just one social group. I have many. I remembered that I have a lot of people who love me and care about me and know that I am good enough just the way I am. As stated, not my place to spread stories or gossip or whatever you want to call it, but I'm glad to have reached a point in my life where I can stand up to a bully and not be afraid or ashamed. I'm glad to have found and re-discovered friends that are dear to me and bring happiness to me. What I've learned from this: real friends are to be loved and cherished. And it is always worth standing up for yourself.
4) My body and I are on uneasy terms. As stated before, we haven't always had the best relationship. As of now, I've lost about five pounds this month, with many more to go. I'm not stopping until I'm pleased with myself and I'm serious about getting healthier. I've cut out all drinks except water, coffee, milk, and tea. I'm taking a multivitamin that should be getting me nutrients in case my food choices don't. I'm kickboxing twice a week and trying to make a gym visit at least once a week in addition to that, with more visits to be added when there's time. And my biggest change, not eating when I'm not hungry, has been a very good change to make indeed. It's a change that has made me face emotions I usually hide with food. I've accepted that this will be a long journey for me to make, but like many others I have embarked on, it will totally be worth it.
That's all for now, folks.
RG
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